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- “Until I wrote it down, it felt like I hadn’t done anything. It was like it just fell from the sky.” How 28 steps led to results.
Наталія у "Своєму просторі" в Дніпрі Natalia Obernyak is 44 years old. She is from Dnipro, and today she lives in her city again — after almost a year and a half abroad, returning home without a clear plan, and a long road to recovery. Before Russia's full-scale invasion of Ukraine, Natalya had experience in corporate management. But by the beginning of 2022, she was already in a difficult internal state: a personal crisis, burnout, fatigue. The full-scale war was superimposed on this like another heavy layer. Until the last moment, she did not believe that the war would actually start. It seemed to her that the situation could still be resolved — politically, economically, through some kind of agreement. But on February 24, Natalia woke up to the explosions and realized: everything had already happened. Her psyche couldn't handle the strain. After the first explosions, she literally "turned off" - she slept for almost a day. When she woke up, it felt like the world had already changed without her. “It seemed like half the country had already left for abroad while I was sleeping,” recalls Natalia. For the first few months, she stayed in Dnipro. She didn't plan to leave because, like many people at the time, she thought, "I'll be home." But the shelling intensified. The woman was most afraid of the carpet bombing. The night when the factory in Dnipro, which was often the target of Russian strikes, was attacked was especially difficult. The explosions lasted all night, and in the morning, Natalya's body reacted with severe nervous urticaria. "I got a big rash all over my leg. And I realized - I can't stand it." Therefore, the woman decided to go abroad, it was a spontaneous decision. At first, it was “for two weeks to visit friends”. But these two weeks turned into almost a year and a half. It didn’t get any easier abroad: another country, a new environment, many everyday and internal challenges. There were almost no resources for adaptation. That's why, in December 2023, Natalia returned to Ukraine. Just as spontaneously. "I can't take it anymore, I can't take it anymore, I want to go home," is how she describes that moment. But returning did not mean automatic relief. She arrived without plans and without strength. The psychological exhaustion was so deep that sometimes she could just lie down and stare at the ceiling, without any thoughts about the future. For almost a year she tried to look for something, try, and get an internship, but the internal resource for stable movement was not enough. Communicating with people was also difficult. In 2025, Natalia accidentally saw information about MARTIN Club events on social networks. She became interested in art therapy meetings, although at the time she didn't even fully understand what it was. She just felt: she needed people. It was important for Natalia that this was a women's space, - "I can't explain why, but it was very important to me. It was a feeling of security." A space where there is a sense of safety, where you can come without having to prove or explain anything. At first it was scary: it seemed like she might be evaluated, judged, that she was “not like that.” But gradually this feeling began to change. In art therapy sessions, women drew, made felt crafts, created skeins, worked with small details. For Natalie, this became a way to return to the “here and now.” She recalls how painting pictures by numbers helped calm her thoughts: concentrating on small details gave a feeling of silence in her head. “You sit and concentrate so much that your head becomes quiet. Just “shhhhh”…” The first class she took was working with felt. “I was generally interested in language courses. And then they said to me, ‘Do you want to join?’ And I was like, ‘Can I? Can you do all this?’” Beads, bright colors, small details — all this helps you focus. The very fact of the completed action became especially important for her. In art therapy, you start something and you get a result. Even if it's small, it's tangible. "You did something here and now. And it is there. And then the thought appears: 'Oh, I can do something else,'" says Natalia. Later, women's circles, one of the activities that take place within the framework of a joint project with the UN Women in Ukraine and funded by the UN Women's Peace and Humanitarian Fund (WPHF) , became for her not only about creativity, but also about communication. There you could talk about important topics, listen to others, share your experiences, or just be there. "What's valuable to me is that I know: they won't bully me. I can say something and everything's fine. Women are very different. From different parts of Ukraine. But now they are support." Later, Natalia learned that the psychologist at MARTIN Club provides free individual consultations, and began working with her personally. This was an important stage, because Natalia's experience was multi-layered and sensitive. It was difficult for her to tell her story anew every time, especially to a new person. Working with one psychologist has created trust and stability. "I don't have to start from scratch every time I meet. And I don't have to prove that I need help to every new psychologist." The psychologist explains that during such meetings, women gradually undergo internal transformations: they understand themselves better, see their experience not as isolated, but as part of a broader human experience, and find inner support. One of the important moments in working with Natalia was realizing her own path. She won a grant to study SMM and network marketing, but at first she perceived it almost as a coincidence. "I won a grant and thought: well, I won and I won." Only during therapeutic work did they, together with the psychologist, begin to break this result down into specific actions. It turned out that 28 steps led to the grant : finding an opportunity, deciding to apply, preparation, paperwork, working on a resume, internal resistance, overcoming the fear of showing up. “Until I wrote it down, it felt like I wasn’t doing anything. It was like it just fell from the sky,” shares Natalia. This was a powerful revelation for her: she saw how much she had actually accomplished. At the same time, Natalia began to return to creativity. She conducts master classes on making candles from beeswax. These classes involve a lot of sensory input: the smell of wax, colors, aromatic oils, compositions, flowers that she collects at the dacha. For her, this is not just a hobby, but another way of recovery. Gradually, she decided to create her own Instagram page as a craftswoman. For some, this may seem like a small step, but for Natalie it was a huge personal achievement. "To show up and declare myself was a challenge for me. And I did it." There were also moments of strong resistance. For example, writing a resume brought her back to difficult past experiences, so she avoided the task for a long time. But after gradual psychological work, she was able to sit down and write it in one night. MARTIN Club psychologist Yulia Sidoruk emphasizes: A grant, training, master classes, or a social media page are already visible results. But behind them lies a much deeper process: the formation of internal support, working with anxiety, and regaining the ability to act. “Natalia had a dream. And through gradual work, we came to its realization,” the psychologist adds. Today, Natalia has tools that help her better understand herself and cope with her conditions. She knows that she can come to a consultation, talk, cry, and break down complex things into understandable parts. For her, accessing psychological support is not about “something is wrong with me.” It’s about being able to survive internally when the external world remains unstable. She says that women of her generation often lacked the experience of a safe environment. “We didn’t have the skills to understand our emotions. There weren’t those spaces.” Childhood in the 90s, growing up in difficult social conditions, the lack of skills to talk about emotions — all of this still has an impact today. "If you're not a mother, a wife, a woman 'in some role', you don't exist. But here you just exist. And you're welcome." That's why supportive spaces are important for women of all ages, backgrounds, and life circumstances. Not just those with children. Not just those in apparent crisis. But for anyone who needs a place to be heard. To other women who are afraid to turn to a psychologist, Natalia would say a simple thing: "There's no need to be afraid of this. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. It's helping you find your way and get the support that we really need right now." And adds the most important thing: "To keep going, to function, to do something for yourself and for the community, you need to start with yourself." The project "Enhanced Protection of Women and Girls" is implemented by the NGO "MARTIN-Club" with the technical support of UN Women in Ukraine and funding from the UN Women's Peace and Humanitarian Fund (WPHF), a flexible and operational funding instrument that supports quality activities to enhance the capacity of local women in conflict prevention, crisis and emergency response, and the use of key peacebuilding opportunities. This story was produced with the financial support of the United Nations Women's Peace and Humanitarian Fund (WPHF), but this does not mean that the views expressed and the content are officially endorsed or recognized by the United Nations.
- NGO MARTIN-club supports families raising children with disabilities by providing them with alternative sources of nutrition.
From the start of the full-scale invasion (February 2022) to early 2026 more than 63,000 energy facilities were damaged, and about 2.9 thousand missiles and 12.7 thousand attack UAVs. Tens of millions of Ukrainians regularly lived without electricity. Among them are children with disabilities who depend on electricity to maintain their health and life. In Dnipro, together with the Center for Psychosocial Support of the Population "Dotyk" and the "POMAGAYEM" Foundation, the NGO MARTIN-club supports families raising children with disabilities, providing them with alternative sources of nutrition. This allows you to stay connected, maintain your daily life, and most importantly, ensure continuous care for your children even during power outages. The project provides families with alternative power sources: 35 portable EcoFlow stations, as well as expanding support through the transfer of 250 high-power power banks and providing assistance to 200 families in the form of vouchers (cash certificates) to cover basic needs. In times of war, power outages have become a part of daily life. But for families raising children with disabilities, the lack of light means much more: the inability to prepare meals, provide care, or support a child's education. There are children who cannot feed themselves, and then a blender becomes a necessity. There are families where care is completely dependent on electrical appliances. And in these moments, light is not about comfort, but about basic stability and safety. For over 26 years, the MARTIN-club NGO has been working with children and families who find themselves in difficult life circumstances. The project is implemented by the NGO MARTIN-club and funded by ERIKS Development Partner, Eastern Europe Office and Radio Aid ERIKS and Radio Aid do not necessarily share the views and interpretations expressed. Responsibility for the content lies entirely with the author.
- Why do children stay silent — even when dozens of “responsible” adults are around?
In Dnipro, a long-term torture of six children in a family-type orphanage (DBST) has been exposed. According to the Dnipropetrovsk Regional Prosecutor's Office and police , the children lived for years in an atmosphere of fear, physical pain, and systemic humiliation. The facts, published in the materials of " Ukrainska Pravda " , are shocking: this was not a single outburst of anger, but a pattern of violence built up over years. However, it is important to understand the context: despite this terrible incident, family-type orphanages remain a worthy and necessary alternative to boarding schools. All over the world, boarding schools are officially recognized as places of deprivation of freedom, where torture and degradation of the personality are often part of the system itself, and not the crime of individual people. In boarding schools, the child is deprived of individuality, and violence often becomes a tool for “management” of a large group. DBST, even in crisis situations, provides for a family model, which, provided that proper control is provided, is the only chance for the child for a normal future. But the most painful question in the Dnipro case is another: How could it have lasted five years? During this time, a group of people were with the children to ensure their safety: Children's Services. They are required to conduct regular inspections and monitor living conditions. School. Teachers saw the children every day, their psychological state, and their physical appearance. Doctors: Routine examinations and treatments should reveal traces of physical impact. Social workers. Those who should provide support to the family. This case does not indicate the shortcomings of the idea of family upbringing itself, but the critical failure of control mechanisms. When inspections become a formality, and state bodies turn a blind eye to "inconvenient" signals, the system becomes an accomplice in the crime. The tragedy in Dnipro is a call for an immediate revision of how the state supervises the safety of children in all forms of upbringing. Why do children stay silent? We often assume that a child will tell us if they are in pain. But abuse is not just about hitting. It is about a complete loss of control over one's life and sense of security. A child is silent when: does not trust adults; she had already tried to speak and was not heard; afraid that it will get worse; convinced that she is to blame; lives in an environment where violence is called "upbringing." In this case, the signal appeared only when the eldest child left the system and was able to seek help. Before that, she turned to various institutions, trying to get support, but was actually not heard. Only after contacting public organizations and providing legal support by MARTIN Club, the case received procedural movement and an investigation began. This is a very revealing moment. A safe environment for a complaint arose not inside the system, but outside it. This means that the problem is not just the cruelty of specific people. The problem is in the defense mechanisms that have not worked. Formal control ≠ real security The presence of inspections does not guarantee their effectiveness, and control focused on papers does not provide security to the child. The child protection system often works reactively — after a complaint is made. But if a child doesn't have a real, safe channel to report abuse, a complaint won't come forward. And then silence is perceived as the absence of a problem. The head of the NGO MARTIN-club, Victoria Fedotova, describes this situation as follows: "Analysis of the current situation indicates the inexpediency of searching for individual culprits, the problem is the lack of timely detection of violations. The reasons for silence were institutional weakness and professional deformation and indifference of responsible persons to signals from children. The combination of these factors — from an inadequate level of qualification to a formal approach to performing duties — created an environment in which the child was left without proper protection." What needs to change — otherwise it will happen again This case cannot remain just another criminal proceeding. If we do not change our approaches, similar stories will be repeated — in another community, in another family, in another institution. After this case, at the system level it is necessary to: 1. Real independent monitoring. Not just official inspections, but mechanisms that do not depend on the same decision-making structures. 2. Regular individual conversations with children without the presence of guardians are mandatory. The child must have a guaranteed space to talk. 3. Effective complaint channels available to the child himself. Not formal "hotlines", but clear and safe tools. 4. Personal liability of officials in case of ignoring signals. Without this, control remains a formality. 5. Working with trust. The most important thing is that the system should not be punitive, but one that the child believes in. Because the main problem of this story is not only torture. The main problem is that for years the children did not believe that anyone would hear them. And if we don't create an environment in which a child knows they won't be betrayed, no amount of reform will be enough. MARTIN-club accompanies the affected children in this proceeding and represents their interests in the courts and law enforcement agencies. We provide not only legal, but also psychological support to minimize the risk of re-traumatization and help children go through this difficult process without additional pressure. Our task is to ensure that this case does not disappear in the system, and that the rights of children are truly protected.
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